So what do you do when life suddenly seems gloomy, nothing’s happening or you feel like you’re stuck in a dark, dingy ditch? OR life surprises you with an amazing opportunity and you feel frozen with fear, anxiety and self-doubt?
1 a : an attack made without warning b : a taking unawares 2 : the feeling caused by something unexpected or unusual
First things first: BREATHE. Take deep breaths to allow extra oxygen into all the cells of your body. It helps you to calm down and clear your thoughts.
This “surprise” is an opportunity for you to change your mind, shift your focus or do something different.
- Play the “what if” game with a positive spin, instead of with the pessimistic one you like to use.
- Forgive yourself for making a mistake, behaving badly or letting an opportunity pass you by. Treat yourself as you would your best friend – be patient and kind with yourself, give yourself another chance to try again.
- Decide that you are willing to change your mind and adopt a new productive perspective. Talk about this new idea, read about it, practice positive affirmations about it – inundate your mind with it until it becomes second nature.
- Find things to do that put a big smile on your face or make you laugh uncontrollably. Watch funny movies, read inspiring stories, do fun things with friends and family, reminisce about times when you got what you wanted or were so pleasantly surprised that you felt like a child on Christmas morning filled with joy and gratitude. Practice, practice, practice, and practice some more, the feelings of joy and gratitude.
- Seek help or advice from a professional or someone you trust, admire or respect.
- Be courageous and take risks. Allow yourself to feel uncomfortable temporarily while you try something new, or different, so that you can obtain a different, more desirable outcome. You’ll never know if something will really work for you unless you try it and stick with it for a while to see what happens.
Mel’s Two Cents: We will be at this place of “surprise” many times in our lives. Be easy about it. Be kind to yourself and take good care. Do what’s best for you, feels good and brings you joy. Have confidence and faith that you will get through this or that you can do this. You are the only one who has control over your mind, body and life, so choose what makes you happy. There are many voices in the world telling you what’s “right” and what to do and how to do it. BUT your voice is the only one that matters, so what are you telling yourself?! I’d whisper sweet nothings to myself and remind myself that I am smart, I do have something of value to offer, and I am loving, accepting and respecting myself from this day forward!
Until next time.
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